Straight Jacket Romance -8-

"Hey, get up." I felt something nudging me and opened my eyes with a yawn.

I was surprised to not feel odd for once. Normally I woke feeling exhausted still or dying of thirst but I felt no real symptoms. It took me a moment to realize that it was due to having not taken my medication the previous night. I had fallen asleep on my own without little trouble. I looked to whom had woken me to recognize it to be Alice.

"What's going on?" I asked stretching a bit before sitting up.

I wondered why he had woken me up. It was the first time he had during my stay here. All other times he let me sleep in as late as the medication let me. Glancing to the window I noticed the sun was high in the sky and bright. It had to be morning and I wondered if I had slept as long as to lunch time.

I pushed the blankets off my body finding myself rather warm. Alice found an empty spot and took a seat on the edge of my bed. He looked to me for a moment and smiled. Gently he reached out and pushed my messy hair behind my ears. I gave him a soft smile. I loved how so simply he took care of me. It was cute really.

"They are letting us outside for a little while to eat and walk around. They don't do it often but with winter coming, we'd get out even less. Not seeing the sun depresses a lot of the patients so it's a must." He explained with a sense of excitement.

It was almost sad that I was so eager to get out myself. I hadn't been in here very long but still I missed the 'outside world'. Anything to get away from this inmate feeling. And those annoying sea foam green walls that covered every inch of the building it seemed. I could really use the time in the fresh air.

"When can we get out?" I pushed the covers all the way off moving over to the edge of the bed sitting with Alice now, side by side.

"Now. Bambi's already out there eating breakfast. Come on, let's hurry." He stood up extending his hand to me.

I placed my hand in his as he moved his fingers to lock with mine. I looked to our interlocked fingers, studying them for a second time and nodded as I stood. There was something calming about holding his hand. I liked that I did not have to feel paranoid of something he was plotting. I trusted Alice to guide me along. In fact, I believe he was exactly what I needed to remind myself not all men were evil. He wasn't malicious at all, he was very kind. And not just to me.

Alice led me off down the hallway towards a set of large double doors. They were gated and barred but a window could be seen. Peaking through I could see a courtyard that extended far into the distance. The orderlies parted for us opening the doors. I recognized one of them, the snickering one, to be Tony. We walked out and my first breath of fresh air was exhilarating. It tasted like freedom.

"I miss this." I admitted to Alice softly as a wind picked up carrying the scent of fall through the air.

I felt like I could finally breath again. It was as if simply being restored something in me again. It was surprising how warm it was for a fall day especially with winter creeping ever closer. Soon snow would litter the ground and like Alice stated, we would not be let outside much. I needed to enjoy this while I could.

I glanced to Alice realizing he had not answered me and in fact stood very still. I noticed his eyes were closed as he smiled softly just breathing for a movment. He had been here much longer than I. Perhaps this freedom tasted much sweeter to him having been denied it longer than me. I smiled finding this both an adorable quality as well as a heartbreaking one to witness. He finally opened his eyes looking over to me.

"Enjoy it, trust me." He gave me a half smile.

In the distance I could see Bambi sitting at a picnic table, eating. Alice continued to lead me off to join her.

"Will we be able to walk around after breakfast?" I questioned.

He gave a small nod of his head.

"Not far but it's nice to be able to go off without an orderly or Gail breathing down your neck checking your every move." He shook his head.
"Though if you behave oddly someone will follow you so I'd avoid shouting or suspicious movements. I usually walk up that path for a bit to think. You're more than welcome to come along with me." He offered.

I gave a nod of my head as we came closer to the group releasing hands. Alice was rather affectionate in general so I knew no one would take it as us being anything more than friends. I glanced to the right and saw Gail's eyes locked on mine angrily. She looked furious with me. And I had just the feeling why she'd be giving me that look.

"Yeah, I'd like that." I responded to him as I took a seat at the table with Bambi where food was waiting.

I picked up my fork taking a bite to eat. Out of the corner of my eye I looked to Gail again to see she had not stopped staring at me. I swallowed my food a little uneasily as I dropped my gaze to my plate. I seemed to have put myself more predominately on her radar.

"Can you believe we're outside Em?" Bambi asked me eagerly.

Her whole face was animated with excitement. I glanced to her, seeing her entire body bouncing from the movement of the leg that seemed to have a mind of its own. She was aching to move, to escape in the nice weather. As were we all, really.

"I can't wait to go play!" She exclaimed about to stand.

Alice grabbed a hold of her arm swiftly.

"Ah, ah. You finish eating first." He reminded her firmly with a point of his finger.

Bambi sighed and nodded her head taking quiet bites of her food. You could tell she didn't want to listen to Alice but still did.

"I can't believe we're outside Bambi. I'm excited about it." I smiled and she returned it still eating her food quickly so she could leave the table.

I thought it was kind of funny that Alice had instructed her to finish all her food before playing. It did make him appear much more like a parent that way. She really did look up to him as an authoritative figure.

"Are you going to play with me?" She questioned looking at me from beneath her lashes almost shyly.

I gave her a gentle shake of my head. I had plans with Alice that I was eager to fulfill. She frowned instantly, looking really hurt by the new information.

"It's not that I don't want to but I promised Alice I would take a walk with him." I told her in a soft voice hoping she would understand.

With her child mentality I was unsure she would understand why I wished to go off with Alice. I wasn't looking forward into giving her a talk about relationships or anything. My words often got lost in strange situations like that. Which is why her reaction surprised me a bit. Her frown was gone almost instantly.

"Okay. You go with him." She gave a nod.

I saw her smile a moment later biting her lip a little whist she grinned. It was the first time I had seen this expression on her face. I watched her. She was up to something.

"Why are you grinning like that Bambi?" I asked her glancing to the left to see if she saw something I was unaware of.

Alice even seemed to be smiling a little now. This increased my paranoia. They had either done something, planned something or were in the middle of doing something. And I hadn't caught on yet to their plans.

"You guys, come on!" I glared at them wanting to be let in on whatever they found funny.

"It's nothing Emi." She assured me patting my arm gently.

I just stared at her. The action seemed like something an adult would do and Bambi was not known for that kind of behavior. She was always very childish. It was part of her mental state. Things were only getting more and more strange around her.

"You can go play now." Alice said using the tip of his fork to point to her now empty tray.

Bambi's eyes lit up as she sprang from the table. She didn't wait a second longer. She just rushed off to escape for whatever time we had outside.

"Thank you, Alice!" She nodded towards him before going off into the field.

I turned to watch her for a moment. She ran around, twirling in circles with her arms outstretched. She did seem like an overgrown child. There was such a naivety to the world, a real innocence about her despite her adolescent image. I directed my attention back towards Alice who was watching her still. I forked my food taking another bite. Even now I couldn't get a good taste of what it was. I wondered if the food was meant to just be bland so that it would not evoke any kind of feeling out of us.

"So what were you two grinning about?" I asked looking him straight in the eyes.

Alice directed his attention to me. He smiled softly.

"We had a talk this morning about you." It was not the answer I was expecting at all.

In fact I thought I'd be the last thing the two of them discussed together.

"What about?" I was actually kind of fearful to hear what they had said to one another but still I couldn't let the question go unanswered.

"She asked if I liked you actually..." He smiled watching my expression.

I knew I showed my shock but I didn't think Bambi could comprehend something like that. Maybe she thought of it in a friendship kind of way?

"And how did you answer that question?" I looked away from him back to my tray.

I pushed the food around taking another bite. I didn't want to look up at him when he answered. I didn't like trying to make him feel pressured into answering the questions I had for him. I heard Alice's chuckle.

"I told her truthfully that I did." I raised my eyes to see he was smiling.

He reached out with his left hand taking my own.

"But I also told her not to get her hopes up for anything. Bambi needs stability in her life and I need you to promise me something." He interlocked his fingers with mine and I just stared at him.

"Anything." I assured him.

Alice had so unselfishly done so many things here for me. Even from the first day I had arrived he was sweet and kind to me. I could promise him something. In fact I was determined to continue to make it up to him for his kindness.

"If...if at any point this..." He struggled with his words looking away from me.

I took his hand a little more tightly. I wanted him to be open and honest with me. If my feelings got hurt then they did. I didn't want him to shy away from saying what he needed to.

"If it doesn't work out, would you still be sweet to Bambi? Could you still give her a female role model to look up to?" He asked softly.

For a moment I said nothing, stunned. I prayed he was simply being cautious of Bambi's well-being and not telling me that he did not expect this to last. I gathered myself after a moment smiling at him.

"I would never be anything but sweet to Bambi. She deserves something good in her life." I assured him, smiling still.

Alice gave a nod of his head seeming more relaxed now.

"Why don't we go take that walk? If we're cautious we might be able to sneak down that path to the woods. It'd give us some alone time. They don't go anywhere though..." He glanced down for a moment shaking his head.
"I once tried to escape through there. On the other side there is a giant metal fence with barbed-wire." He made a small laughing sound.
"And they call us patients here... Too bad they treat us like inmates." There was a hostility in his voice I had not heard since last night when Tony started up with him about the television.

I just nodded my head. It must have been hard on Alice coming here, enough where he wanted to escape.

"There really isn't a difference." It suddenly dawned on me.

Despite Alice seeming a bit angrier than needed over our situation he was right. This was more of a prison than a sanctuary for us.

"All it takes is one thing to get you sent somewhere. No one will ever let you live down being here Alice. And honestly, I don't see what they are doing to help us improve. They just pop people full of pills and say they're better." I cringed at the thought.

It all seemed so dark and hopeless.

"Our families are just going to leave us here...If mine even knows I'm here." I sucked in a breath, my head spinning.

I don't know if I had found mental clarity because I had not taken their medication in a day but suddenly things made perfect sense to me. I pushed my tray of food away and stood up taking in a big breath. I was grateful for the slight chill to the weather, it seemed to calm me down and cool me off.

"We need that walk..."Alice stood putting his arm around my waist.